Now What?

I realize I've been neglecting my blog for some time now, and according to my Google Analytics account, people have actually been consistently stopping by (I know, weird right?) so I thought I might indulge the few readers I've got (hi mom!) and give an update:

I graduated from college about a month and a half ago. It feels really strange to say I've graduated, let alone over six weeks ago. Honestly, besides not attending classes everyday or studying for tests, it doesn't feel much different - I feel like I'm on an extended vacation in which I work everyday (not too sure what kind of vacations I've been on).

In the last couple of months, I've come realize that not everything I plan for is going to happen. Since I can remember, my future plans have always followed a natural progression - elementary school, middle school, high school, college; I've always known my next step. For the first time in my life, I can't tell you where I'll be in a year. Or half a year. Or even in a few months. I'm playing the waiting game.

And to be honest, it's a little scary.

And to be even more honest, it's a little exhilarating.

Yes, my future is up in the air right now, and waiting for a decision on my grad school admissions appeal is daunting, but at this moment, there's nothing I can do to expedite the process. Maybe I'll find out today. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe a week or month from now (but hopefully not that long).

Maybe I'll go to grad school in the fall. Maybe I'll have to reapply next year. No matter what the decision is, I have a really good feeling that everything's going to work itself out. Why worry about something you ultimately have little control over? I've decided to live in the now. And the now is pretty damn good.